Speaking of Pinterest

I find it hilarious how some people have boards called "Geeky" or "I'm Such a Nerd" or something like that, and then there's people who have a board for Harry Potter, a board for Lord of the Rings, a board for The Hobbit, a board for Doctor Who, a board for Sherlock, a board for Narnia, a board for Star Trek, a board for Supernatural, etc. etc. And each board has about 500 pins on it.

Sorry, I just think that's hysterical.

"Counting With Numbers"

I was babysitting last night, and the kids had left some schoolbooks out on the dining room table, one of which was called "Counting With Numbers." Which is an oddly specific title, given that the only way to count is by using numbers.

I suppose, if we wanted to, we could count with Roman Numerals instead of numbers. But I don't think anybody's attempted to do that in the last couple millennia.

I'm trying to think how to count without using numbers. I'll google a definition for "count."

Here's one:

count: to determine the total number of (a collection of items)

Ok, so if you wanted to find out how many jelly beans you have, you could "count" them without actually counting by measuring the weight of the total amount of jelly beans, then measuring the amount of one jelly bean and dividing the total weight by the weight of one jelly bean, giving you the number of jelly beans in your possession.

Side note: I realized that I don't write how I talk. I'd never actually say "in your possession." I'd say something more like, "you got." And now I feel dishonest and mistrustworthy for not writing how I talk.

Anyway, even if you did take the weight of your jelly beans and use division and all that rot, you'd still be using numbers. In which case, the title "Counting With Numbers" is redundant. I thought it was, I just wanted to make sure.

Changing the subject completely, I am in Total Hobbit Mode this summer. I've been pinnning about 500 Tolkien-related stuff on Pinterest every day.

I feel like

Person: Hi!

Me: Lord of the Rings.

Person: How're you?

Me: Lord of the Rings.

Person: What're you doing later?

Me: Lord of the Rings.

Person: Want to get some lunch?

Me: Lord of the Rings.

Also Battle of the Five Armies is coming out in 4 months and several of my favorite characters are going to die, and I will be very dangerous with sadness and feelings and stuff, so don't touch me or talk to me or breathe on me. But I'm not sad now, because I'm wearing my favorite shirt.

Anyway, good night. Elizabeth out

Bat-Art #1: David

I have nothing to say in my defense except that I felt like doing this so I did.

This is Michelangelo's David traced from an art book and Batmanified for my entertainment.

I hope it's not disrespectful to the real David. Or Michelangelo. Now I'm starting to feel bad.

Anyway, here it is.

How To Be A Healthy Person Without Going Kaput And Dying

I have made a Magnificent Discovery. Here it is:

If you like chocolate, you're nuts about it, which means you're a cocoa-nut.

Cocoa-nut = coconut

Coconuts are healthy.

If you are what you eat, then you eat what you are. Therefore, if you are a coconut, you eat coconuts.

Coconuts are healthy.

You are healthy.

CONCLUSION: Love chocolate and live a long, healthy, and prosperous life with your children, your wives, and your riches.

Poem #38: Potatoes

I came across a website where you can submit poems and they put them up, as long as they're Tolkien-related. Which, I need not say, is awesome, so I gave it a try.

This is Sam Gamgee teaching his daughter how to cook PO TA TOES.

Elanor, my pretty lass,

come here to your Daddy.

Mother's feeling poor today, 

bent and worn and shaddy. 

Supper is on us tonight, 

stew I think we'll make it. 

Pull out those potatoes, love, 

I'll bring Mum a blanket. 

Taters by your Daddy are

the best in all the Shire. 

Come, I'll show you how to proper

stew them over fire. 

Take your knife, now mind your fingers,

shave the dirty skin.

Now we have the pretty white

potato from within. 

Chop it into little pieces, 

not too big, nor small. 

In the pot they go with mutton, 

vittles, herbs and all. 

Now we wait and rest a moment

while our taters brew. 

Then, when all our waiting's up,

we'll have a lovely stew. 

Scoop a little in the bowl, 

careful with the ladle!

Bring some to your Mother now,

and mind your brother's cradle. 

Have some stew yourself, now lass, 

we've worked hard today. 

Being mother isn't easy, 

even for a day.

L. Frank Baum on Puns

From The Marvelous Land of Oz:

"...a joke derived from a play upon words is considered among educated people to be eminently proper."

"What does that mean?" enquired the Pumpkinhead, stupidly.

"It means, my dear friend," explained the Woggle-Bug, "that our language contains many words having a double meaning; and that to pronounce a joke that allows both meanings of a certain word, proves the joker a person of culture and refinement, who has, moreover, a thorough command of the language."

"I don't believe that," said Tip, plainly; "anybody can make a pun."

"Not so," rejoined the Woggle-Bug stiffly. "It requires education of a high order. Are you educated, young sir?"

"Not especially," admitted Tip.

"Then you cannot judge the matter. I myself am Thoroughly Educated, and I say that puns display genius. For instance, were I to ride upon this Saw-Horse, he would not only be an animal-he would become an equipage. For he would then be a horse-and-buggy."

At this the Scarecrow gave a gasp and the Tin Woodman stopped short and looked reproachfully at the Woggle-Bug. At the same time, the Saw-Horse loudly snorted his derision; and even the Pumpkinhead put up his hand to hide the smile which, because it was carved upon his face, he could not change to a frown.

But the Woggle-But strutted along as if he had made some brilliant remark, and the Scarecrow was obliged to say:

"I have heard, my dear friend, that a person can become over-educated; and although I have a high respect for brains, no matter how they may be arranged or classified, I begin to suspect that yours are slightly tangled. In any event, I must beg you to restrain your superior education while in our society."

"We are not very particular," added the Tin Woodman; "and we are exceedingly kind-hearted. But if your superior culture gets leaky again-" He did not complete the sentence, but he twirled his gleaming axe so carelessly that the Woggle-Bug looked frightened and shrank away to a safe distance.

The others marched on in silence, and the Highly-Magnified one, after a period of deep thought, said in a humble voice:

"I will endeavor to restrain myself."

"That is all we can expect," returned the Scarecrow, pleasantly; and good nature being thus happily restored to the party, they proceeded upon their way.

                                                                                    -L. Frank Baum, The Marvelous Land of Oz

Flowers for the Woggle-Bug for knowing what's what :]

"Demons" + "Just Give Me A Reason" Duet Blueprint [Unfinished]

I was listening to "Demons" by Imagine Dragons, and I had an idea that it might make a good duet if it was combined with "Just Give Me A Reason" by P!nk.

If I was brilliant at making music videos or arranging music, I'd arrange the music and make a music video, but I'm not brilliant at either one, so I didn't.

However I did make a sort of outline of how I think it could work.

Blue = Demons
Red = Just Give Me A Reason

The bits with slashes are supposed to be sung at the same time [by two different people].

I didn't go through the whole of either song, because I can't because I don't feel like it. But I might later and maybe I'll try it out on my viola.

When the days are cold

And the cards all fold

And the saints you see are all made of gold

When your dreams all fail

And the ones we hail

Are the worst of all and the blood’s run stale

I wanna hide the truth,

I wanna shelter you,

But with the beast inside,

There’s nowhere we can hide

No matter what we breed

We still are made of greed

This is my kingdom come

This is my kingdom come

Right from the start, you were a thief,

You stole my heart, and I your willing victim

I let you see the parts of me that weren’t all that pretty

And with every touch you fixed them

Now you’ve been talking in your sleep, oh oh

Things you never say to me, oh oh

Tell me that you’ve had enough of our love

Our love 

Just give

When you feel my heat/me a reason

Look into my eyes/Just a little bit’s enough

It’s where my demons hide/Just a second, we’re not broken just

It’s where my demons hide/bent, and we can learn to love again

Don’t get

too close/it’s in the stars

it’s dark inside/it’s been written in the scars on our hearts

It’s where my demons hide/we’re not broken just bent,

It’s where my demons hide/and we can learn to love again