Poem #44: Djinn and Tonic

"Bottle, bottle, my relief,

free me now from hurt and grief

save my mind and heart from pain,

be my fortune, be my gain."

From the glassy curves there sprang

something drawn by my harangue

frothing bubbles formed without,

seeping from the bottle's spout.

Stumbling, I drank it in,

be it whiskey, beer or Djinn

"Spirits, seek my wish," I said,

"Fill my heart and fill my head."

All that merry drunken night,

all the earth was filled with light

in my simple hut I found

lofty wishes brought to ground.

But as the moon began to wane,

sunlight bottled luck and gain

mind and heart began to clear

and faced the sun, bereft of fear.

"I Must Admit" and "I'm Sorry"

I'm not allowed to apologize anymore, so I'm just going to warn you that this is another overanalysis of expressions used by the English-speaking human population which I am writing because I have time to kill. You've been warned, this is not an apology, end of speech.


I've noticed lately that when people want to pay something or someone a compliment, they often start with the phrase "I must admit." And there's nothing wrong with that, it just tickles my brain sensitivity because I always wonder why they "must admit." Admission, as far as I know, usually happens after a person has said the opposite of what he's admitting, but I keep hearing it when people are just making a non-contradicted comment. For example, you only have to "admit" that the spaghetti I made is good if before you said something like "I am of the opinion that your spaghetti will suck big time." But if you didn't say that, which I hope you didn't, you wouldn't have to "admit" anything. You could just say my spaghetti is delicious (which it is) and call it a day.


I don't have a problem with people saying "I must admit." You can say it till the cows come home for all I care, I'm just in an overanalytical mood and now I'm apologizing again so I'm going to stop talking.


That's another thing that bothers me. People, I have found, tend to assume I'm apologizing every time I say "I'm sorry," but it's not always an apology. I say "I'm sorry" when


1. I wish to apologize
2. I wish to give my condolences.


For example,


Person: My cow was hit by a truck.
Me: Oh, dear. I'm sorry.
Person: No, don't apologize, it's not your fault.


I wish I had a nickel for every time. I didn't hit your cow with my truck, and if I did, I'd be the last person to admit it. I'm not apologizing, I'm offering my condolences. If you don't want condolences, then there's nothing I can do for you. I suppose I could get you a new cow, but that is something for which ain't nobody got time, including me. Plus I can't afford a new cow. I don't even think I can afford a used cow. Get your own damn cow.


That's all I got to say about that.

This Is Not A Drill

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

Told you. Have a nice day!

Poem #43: Night and Day

The Princess Fay once ran away

and built a great balloon

She warmed its air with greatest care

and sailed beyond the Moon

She drifted far to night and star

that sunny day in June.

"Balloon," said Fay, "take me from day,

from Sun and green and light."

They flew so high the Gemini

came dancing through the night

with good Orion and the Lion

following in flight.

She stopped to dine on fruits and wine

from dippers great and little

in lark and mirth away from Earth

where joy was faint and brittle,

where nothing slept and shadows crept

and stifled fife and fiddle.

The Princess sang, the comets rang

with echoes, sweet and soft

But far from home, she was alone

in utter dark aloft

so none too soon, she called "Balloon!

it's high time we were off."

She touched down basket in the grassy

meadow, damp with dew

And so that day, the Princess Fay

loved Sun and light anew.

In grassy green, she was the queen

of sky, both black and blue.



The Battle of the Five Armies [real] Trailer

My reaction:

BILBO!!!!!

THORIN!!!!!

SARUMAN!!!!

BARD!!!!

WAR BATS!!!!

THRANDUIL + TAURIEL!!!!!

BILBO!!! GANDALF!!!!

KILI!!!!!!

ERMEGHERD!!!!!

copyright note: I don't own these images, I stole them.