According to The Internet,
People
1. Love
- cats
- coffee
- alcohol
- eating
- introverts
2. Hate
- Mondays
- People
- wearing pants and a bra
3. Do
- nothing
- everything
4. Can't
- even
5. Can
- n/a
Animals
1. rule
2. are better than people
3. do not suck in any way whatsoever
4. not even when they poop
5. or drool
6. so awesome I can't even
7. like literally I can't even
Government
1. sucks
2. especially Republicans
3. and Democrats
4. does everything wrong
5. even though it's made up of humans
Memes
1. will convert an entire audience with one picture and a few words in Impact font
2. except for when they don't
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