Knuckle-Cracking

People who have at one point in their lives been in the same room as me know that I tend to crack my knuckles loudly and constantly. Due to my knuckle-cracking, I have been murdered several times in fits of rage (not my rage, other people's rage) and have endured several lectures on the benefits of non-knuckle-cracking, such as not getting arthritis. 

People who hold this view are like the Health teacher from the movie Mean Girls. 

"Don't crack your knuckles. If you crack your knuckles, you WILL get arthritis. And DIE."

I don't know if knuckle-cracking causes arthritis. I have heard several different opinions from about ten gazillion different people, all of whom have conspired to contradict each other for the benefit of my confusion and annoyance. So, I have decided to ignore all of them and observe all the facts for myself in order to decide whether or not I should try to stop. 

Stopping isn't easy. I've had people ask me, "why don't you just STOP, like just DON'T DO IT?" At least people who smoke can throw away their cigarettes; I can't cut off my fingers. 

I don't understand people. I can crack my back all the way up and down and it makes a lovely noise like popcorn, and people say, "Ohhhh, I wish I could do that, it sounds like it feels good." Whereas if I crack my fingers, people say, "Don't crack your knuckles. If you crack your knuckles, you WILL get arthritis. And DIE." 

Anyway, I've made a Pros and Cons list, or rather one list of Pros and one list of Cons, totaling two lists. 

Pros of Stopping Knuckle-Cracking

1. It will make people very happy

2. I possibly will not get arthritis

Cons of Stopping Knuckle-Cracking

1. It will cause me frustration and inner turmoil. 

2. It will possibly be a waste of time if it doesn't cause arthritis. 

3. The word "cracking" is the British word for "brilliant."

4. The word "crack" is apparently Irish slang for "fun."

5. If you take out "-cking" from the word "cracking," and add the letter B to the end, it says "crab," which is delicious. 

So, I've decided ♪ I don't care what you say anymore this is my life/ go ahead with your own life, leave me alone ♪