(Harry)
♪ I was on top of the world, living high
nothing I did was errant
I was living the life
Things were just the way they should be
When, from out of a spell, like a bomb
came that punk who killed my parents
Now all of a sudden
some strange things are happening to me
I had friends, I had lots of friends
Now they're having fun without me
And I'm stuck here in Privet Drive with no company
I had power, I was respected
But not anymore
And I just got attacked
by some jerk Dementors
Let me tell you 'bout the
straaaaaaaaaange things are happening to me
straaaaaaaaaange things
straaaaaaaaaaange things are happening to me
ain't no doubt about it
All this summer I thought I was alone
It turns out I've been stalked
The minute you turn your back
there's weird strangers following you
They think you're a git
for protecting yourself
with some magic
Then they get you expelled
from the school that was so homey to you
Straaaaaaaange things are happening to me
Straaaaaaaange things
Straaaaange things are happening to me
ain't no doubt about it
straaaaaaaaange things...♪
Act 2: #12 Grimmauld Place ("Till I'm Grown" from "The Jungle Book")
(Sirius)
♪ Myyyyyy old hommmme
myyyyyy old hommmme
myyyy old hoommmmme
my old home
Mother's screaming in her portrait
Kreacher's cleaning while he moans
Everyone wants me arrested
So I have to stay at home
Myyyy old hommme
myyyy old hommmme
Everyone wants me arrested
So I have to stay at home ♪
Act 3: Fred, George, and Ginny Celebrate the Result of Harry's Hearing *This part is in the book, not the movie. Fred, George and Ginny dance around the table singing ♪ he got off he got off♪* ("Under the Sea" from "The Little Mermaid")
(Fred, George, Ginny)
♪ The hearing is finally over
And Harry won't be expelled
'Cause Dumbledore came and saved him
from eternal Muggle Hell
And now we can have a party
to celebrate for our chum
and Dumbledore who's a smarty
cause he rescued Harry's bum
Harry got off
Harry got off
Fudge can't expel him
Dumbledore spelled him
just like a boss
Now Harry can go back to school
even though Fudge is such a tool
Drinks all around we
must have a party
Harry got off!♪
Act 4: Professor Umbridge ("The Life I Lead" from "Mary Poppins")
(Umbridge)
♪ A wizard teacher must be a general
the students' future lies within her hands
I will inform the ministry when there is need
when things are getting out of hand.
A wizard ministry is run with precision
A wizard school requires nothing less
Tradition, discipline and rules must be the tooools
without them
disorder!
catastrophe!
anarchy!
in short, we have a ghastly mess!♪
Act 5: In Which Hermione Proposes Harry Teaches Defense ("The Perfect Nanny" from "Mary Poppins")
Hermione: Wanted: a teacher for two adorable children.
♪ If we want to learn defenses
we need someone else to teach us
Handsome face, no warts-
Ron: That's the part I put in!
(Hermione)
♪-learn spells, all sorts.
You must be smart, you must be noble
very brave and very humble
Teach us some jinxes, give advice
charge us no price
If you won't scold and dominate us
we will never give you cause to hate us
we won't hide your spectacles so you can't see
but skrewts in your bed
or maggots in your tea
Hurry, Harry
Many thanks, sincerely
(Ron and Hermione)
♪ Hermione and Ron ♪
Act 6: Fred and George's Fireworks ("The Bare Necessities" from "The Jungle Book")
(Fred and George)
♪Look out for magic fireworks
Our super
magic fireworks
Forget about
your homework and your tests
I mean the
magic fireworks
That make
Professor Umbridge shirk
For our
fantastic fireworks are best
There’s no
one more meaner
So please
make her leave
And when she’s
mean give her
Hell from
us, Peeves
And special
discounts to all those
Who want to
crush her witchy toes
‘cause we’ve
got premises for our shop
To sell joke
stuff and bring us to the top
So maybe,
try a few
And watch
our fireworks, we made them just for you! ♪
Act 7: In Which Harry, Ron, Hermione, Neville, Luna, and Ginny Go Off To Rescue Sirius ("One Jump Ahead" from "Aladdin")
(Harry)
Gotta make
One jump
onto the thestrals
One trip
away from the school
Me and
Voldemort will have a duel
One jump
ahead of his henchmen
To save
Sirius from the foes
Those guys
don’t appreciate I’m pro
(Ron)
Harry…
(Hermione)
think first!
(Ron)
it’s a
trick-
(Hermione)
for sure!
(Harry)
I don’t
think it is guys...
(Ginny)
Hey he’s
here let’s help him out, guys!
(Harry)
I don’t need
your help,
You’ll get
in my way
Then you all
will meet your doom
Ron: Doom?
(Luna)
Yes, but
Harry, we’re part of the squadron
(Neville)
We’re
supposed to fight the villains’ crime
(Hermione)
I’d blame
parents except he hasn’t got ‘em
(Harry)
Sirius will
die, if I don’t go now
Tell you
more about it when I’ve got the time
One jump
onto the thestral
I wish I had
my broom
These things
sometimes make me want to swoon
One flight
over to London
That’s where
Sirius is
This time
nobody is coming with.
(Hermione)
Harry!
(Ron)
Wait up!
(Ginny)
We won’t-
(Neville)
Give up!
(Harry)
You might
never come back…
(Luna)
Look! There goes
a Crumplehorn snorcack!
(Harry)
Don’t have
time for this
Sirius might
die
Fine, then
you can come along
One jump
ahead of the villains
One hop
ahead of the chumps
Or Sirius
faces disaster
They’re
fast, so let’s be faster
Here goes,
gotta throw my hand in
Wish me
happy landin,
All we gotta
do is flyyyyyyy!
The End.
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