And I'm bored. So here's a poem about it. Fair warning, it's rotten.
SPOILER ALERT
Five Little Pigs by Agatha Christie
Poemed for you by Elizabeth
There was a girl of 21
who learned, perhaps too late in life,
her father, painting in the sun,
was killed by his beloved wife.
The wife-her name was Caroline-
was sent to prison that same year
to pay for her supposed crime
of poisoning her husband's beer.
But whilst in jail, she quickly wrote
her innocence upon a page
and sent her daughter that same note
to be opened when she came of age.
The daughter-Carla she was called-
determined that it was the truth
and though so many were appalled,
she asked that Poirot find the proof.
So Poirot went about his way,
pondering the mystery
and while he pondered, he would say,
"It's all about psychology."
He thought, then, he would go and ask
each witness of the dreadful crime
and put each one of them to the task
of writing what happened at the time.
The first one's name was Phillip Blake
the friend of Amyas-the dead.
He had no pity for the sake
of Caroline, but hate instead.
The next was Meredith, a man
who dabbled in the art of herbs
With deadly brews in jars and cans
but he was gentle as a bird.
The third was Elsa, cool and calm
who had been modeling that day
for Amyas, who painted long
before he died beneath her gaze.
The fourth one was a governess,
Miss Williams is what she was called.
She doubted Caroline's innocence
But did not blame her, not at all.
Then Angela was the last one,
the half-sister of Caroline
who-when they both were very young-
had hurt and scarred her for all time.
Then all but for the last witness
said "Oh, she did it. That I know."
But Angela, she did protest
because she loved her sister so.
Then Poirot learned what Elsa did
that had angered Caroline
she flirted much with Amyas
and said "This man will soon be mine."
So Caroline, all but one said,
she spiked her husbands daily beer.
She knew that he would soon be dead
while he was painting Elsa Greer.
Miss Williams saw Caroline
when through the hedges she did glimpse
put the bottle in the dead man's hand
to best secure his fingerprints.
Then Caroline said "suicide!"
As everyone came to the scene
but "murder!" Elsa Greer had cried
And that's exactly what it seemed.
But Poirot, he thought differently,
as the evidence went through his brain
he thought of the psychology
and which one had the most to gain.
And then he said, "It's Elsa Greer!
She poisoned Amyas that day,
she put some coniine in his beer
because he told his wife he'd stay!"
Then Elsa was sent off to jail
and everyone lived happily
and Poirot went to Carla Crale
and together, they had buns for tea.
The End.
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