The Battle of Wits

Has anyone not seen The Princess Bride? If you haven't, then there's a bit when a Strange Man in Black is trying to rescue a princess from a Bad Guy. So, the Man in Black confronts the Bad Guy, whose name is Vizzini, and they have a Battle of Wits in which the Man in Black puts some poison called Iocane into one goblet of wine, and Vizzini has to guess which goblet is poisoned, and then they both drink "and find out who is right, and who is dead."

Here's the conversation they have.

Only in Haiku because I'm bored.

Man in Black:

I put the poison
In one of these two goblets
Now you guess which one.

Vizzini:

But it's so simple.
I just have to think of you
and what you would do.

If you were clever,
you would poison your own cup
'cause I'd take that one.

But I could be dumb,
And you don't know that I'm smart,
so mine could be spiked.

Man in Black:

Have you decided?
One is poisoned, one is not.
Choose wisely, my friend.

Vizzini:

I cannot decide
because Iocane is from
Australia, right?

And Australia
has lots of bad criminals
who are not trusted.

And I don't trust you,
and you know that so I think
that your cup is spiked.

Man in Black:

You are confusing.
You're overthinking this thing.
You're annoying me.

Vizzini:

You interrupt me!
Now I don't know where I was.
Do you remember?

Man in Black:

Oh, yes. I do, chum.
You were talking of that place
called Australia.

Vizzini:

Oh, yes. Thank you, sir.
That is where I was, indeed.
I will continue.

This is Iocane,
and I knew where it came from,
and you knew I knew.

Therefore, I believe
that it's my cup that's poisoned
and not yours at all.

Man in Black:

You talk way too much.
And you're really annoying.
You're just stalling now.

Vizzini:

You'd like to think that,
But it just isn't true, bub.
I'm thinking this out.

You beat my giant,
which means you are really strong
so it might be yours.

You beat Inigo
with a sword, which means you're smart
and you know you'll die.

Since you know you'll die,
You don't want to drink poison,
so it might be mine.

Man in Black:

You cannot trick me,
I won't give away a thing.
It will not work.

Vizzini:

I think it has worked!
You HAVE given things away!
I know which to choose!

Man in Black:

Then make your choice, bub,
This is getting stupider
I want my princess.

Vizzini:

Oh, wait a second!
What in the world is that?
That is a weird THING!

Man in Black:

What? Where? Who? Why?
I see nothing, you moron.
There is nothing there.

Vizzini:

Oh, there was something.
I thought there was. No matter.
Ha ha ha ha ha.

Man in Black:

What is so funny?
I see nothing humorous.
Tell me what's funny.

Vizzini:

I will tell you soon.
First I'll drink from my glass and
you will drink from yours

Man in Black:

You guessed wrong, moron.
Now you are going to die.
Hee hee hee hee hee.

Vizzini:

That is what you think!
I switched the glasses you fool!
While your back was turned!

You should not have played
with a man from Sicily
in a game of wits!

HA HA HA HA HA
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA
HA HA HA HA HA

[dies]

THE END