Old English

I just had a mind-blowing realization.

The word "don" means to put something ON.

The word "doff" means to take something OFF.

don/on

doff/off

WOW!

On the other hand, the word "doff" rhymes with the word "cough," but if you try to spell "doff" like "dough," it rhymes with "crow" instead of "cough." There's a few poems about stuff like that. I forget what they're called, but they're pretty mind-boggling and funny. Just google "a moth is not a moth in mother, nor broth in brother, both in bother," which I think is one of the lines, unless I'm remembering it wrong, and you should get the whole poem.

There's also an episode of "I Love Lucy" where Ricky keeps mixing up the pronunciations of the words "cough," "bough," "rough," and "through," if I'm remembering that right. I forget what episode it was from.

I think we should go back to speaking Old English because it's cool. If I can learn Old English and then get some other people to learn Old English, we could speak nothing but Old English, and then we could all get married outside the group and our spouses would have to speak Old English too, and then we'd make all our kids learn Old English. That would be fan-bloody-tastic.

If I can get Mary and Thomas to learn Old English, that'll be three people. And then all three of us will get married and make our spouses learn Old English so that'll be six people. And then if we each have at least four kids, that'll be 12 people, and if each one of them gets married and makes his spouse learn Old English that'll be 24 people, and then if they all have four kids each, that'll be 48 people, and then in about 500 years, the whole English-speaking community will be back to Old English and then maybe spelling and grammar and all that rot will make more sense.