Reason #500 why English Grammar Needs Revision

Good morning!

It is now 10:43 in the AM on a Wednesday, and I've already made a hash out of almost everything I've done today. I woke up with the same headache that I had last night, and wanted to lie in bed and do nothing, but couldn't because I've got a Dumb Annoying Dastardly Project on Raw Milk vs. Pasteurized Milk that I've got to finish up for my food science class, and it's due today. 

So I was doing research some research via the Internet which is completely overrated in my opinion, and I came across an article that had pretty much everything I was looking for. This was great, and I added a bunch of the information into my report, but then I finished and looked at the source so I could put it in my Extremely Irritating But Mandatory Diabolical Bibliography. Anyone in college/high school/Hogwarts knows that professors are FUSSY AS HECK about using "Scholarly Sources." The article that I had fallen in love with because it was so helpful turned out to be taken from a book called "Uncle John's Bathroom Reader." Not that there's anything wrong with that; I have a great deal of respect for bathrooms, but I don't think my professor would appreciate my using that source because it doesn't appear very "scholarly." I don't see why it shouldn't though, I mean, scientists and historians and what-not have to use the bathroom too. But anyway, I had to scrap that part of my essay and do a bit of re-writing, which isn't a big deal, it's just annoying because I don't want to. 

I was having a Nice Hot Cup of Coffee with my report and, like an Idiot, put my coffee on my bed because as I've said before, my desk/bedside table is too far away. But then I forgot it was there and reached for something and knocked it over, so my sheets are now completely drenched and I have laundry to do on top of everything ruddy else. 

I probably sound very grumpy today, but I'm actually not. Doing Stupid Things is often more entertaining than anything for me. 

After I my information from the Bathroom Reader went down the drain (BAHAHAHAHA I CRACK MYSELF UP), I was doing some more research and in one article I came across the sentence, 

"Examination of lactating animals and milk handlers, while desirable and of great value, can be done only at intervals."

That made me laugh. That's about the weirdest way they could word that sentence. Here's why:

1. Are the milk handlers lactating too, or just the animals?
2. Are the animals and milk handlers "desirable" or are they referring to the examination?

That just sounds Weird on so many levels. Weird people. I wonder if they ever realized how Weird it sounds. Or maybe they did notice it, but just kept it in cause they're Weird. It just looks wrong. Wrong and Weird. 

Speaking of which, my sister Mary knows the origin of the word "weird," and I don't remember the details at the moment, but if you know her, you should ask, cause it's a Neat Story. 

Hey it's 11:11! make a wish!

I should get back to work. Time to get back to the desirable milk handlers. That's just so weird. 

Bye!