British-American Translator

Hello!

It hit me today that for the past 19 years or so, I've been reading PG Wodehouse and listening to Cabin Pressure and watching shows like Sherlock, the IT Crowd, Jeeves and Wooster, etc. Resulting from this is that once in a while I think I slip into British lingo. So, for your convenience (unless you're already British), I am providing for you now a list of British words that I have used/will probably use in the future with their American translations. I would put them in alphabetical order like a proper List Of Words, but I don't want to.

Telly = Television or TV.

Bagsie = Dibs. Example: "I bagsie the muffin" means "I call dibs on the muffin."

Pants = Underwear

Trousers = Pants

Aeroplane = Airplane

Bloody = Darned

Ruddy = Bloody = Darned

Bleeding = Ruddy = Bloody = Darned

Sodding = Bleeding = Ruddy = Bloody = Darned

Jolly = Sodding = Bleeding = Ruddy = Bloody = Darned (but in a good way)

Bloomin = Jolly = Sodding = Bleeding = Ruddy = Bloody = Darned (usually not in a good way)

Bally = Bloomin = Jolly = Sodding = Bleeding = Ruddy = Bloody = Darned

Flat = Apartment

Tick = Moment. Example: "hang on a tick" = "hang on a minute."

The Pip = being annoyed. Example: "he's got the pip" = "he's very annoyed."

Cheerio = Goodbye

Pip-Pip = Cheerio = Goodbye (I don't know why. Maybe you only use it when you're storming off and you're doubly very annoyed)

Tinkerty-tonk = Pip-pip = Cheerio = Goodbye

Toodle-Pip = Tinkerty tonk = pip-pip = Cheerio = Goodbye

Toodle-oo = Toodle-pip = Tinkerty tonk = pip-pip = Cheerio = Goodbye

What ho = Hello

Bird = Girl/woman/female

Bloke = Boy/man/male

Chap = Boy/man/male

Capital = Awesome

Allew Gov'na = Hello, Rich Man, I haven't brushed my teeth in about a year, so be Warned

P = Penny (as in money, not a girl's name)

Pound = Unit of Money, not weight because they use the metric system unless I'm mistaken, which I'm not.

Wheeze = Expression or Saying

Gag = Wheeze = Expression or Saying

Football = Soccer (because in Soccer, you actually use your feet. In American Football, you don't use your feet. So there's no reason that American Football should be called Football, unless the Ball is made out of Feet).

Cricket = Usually a sort of baseball-like game, but can also refer to the insect

Father Christmas = Santa Clause

Mum = Mom

Toss = don't care. Example: "I don't give a toss" means "I don't care."

Hash = Mess Up. Example: "make a hash of something" means "make a mess of something"

Wee-wee = Pee

Toilet = Bathroom. Example: "I'm in the toilet" means "I'm in the bathroom." Note to British People: if you come to America, and go to a bathroom, and then come out, and an American Person asks where you were and you say, "I was just in the toilet," they will assume that you were literally inside the toilet with the water and the drain and everything. Sometimes this is the case, if you have Three Brothers Who Forget To Put The Toilet Seat Back Down, and then you go to the bathroom and don't notice, because then you fall in. It's Unpleasant. But that's not usually the case. Chances are your brothers will just as likely not put the toilet seat up at all before they Go, so you have a Nice Wet Seat to sit on when you Go. But anyway, when you're in America, it's best to say "I was just in the bathroom," or "I was just in the restroom," although you probably weren't resting. When I find time to rest, I don't spend it in the bathroom, I lie in bed and watch Doctor Who with some Delicious Junk Food.

Loo = Toilet = Bathroom (see above).

Berk = Idiot

Clot = Berk = Idiot

Sod = Clot = Berk = Idiot

Dickens = Heck. Example: "what the dickens" = "what the heck."

That's all I can think of at the moment.

Anyhoo, I'm tired. Night!